Awwww, merde.

I got a wonderful box full of birthday goodies from bestie Hillary! 

The kitchen sticky notes are already proving useful.

 

I go through stationery like crazy, these are so pretty! 

The envelopes are a wonderful maroon color.

For Strange Women is one of my favorite Etsy shops! 

I am one of these people! Hah.

Jackpot! My new favorite pillow. 

♥

Visual Aids ♥

I think, besides shoes and cooking, that this blog might turn into a way for me to inspire myself, visually. I like to look through fashion blogs [Knight Cat, Wildfox, etc.] for inspiration, so I figure I could do a bit of that myself. I have an unholy amount of pictures collected over the years and I scroll through them whenever I'd like some visual comfort or inspiration. Some of them are me or taken by me and some of them are just collected from wherever.  If this gets annoying, let me know ... although, I'm not sure I'll stop! 

♥

'Cause I'm a Free Bitch, Baby!

Gagaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa!! I've been listening to Bloody Mary on repeat. My summer is about to get really busy, but I had some down time this weekend to clean, make Zombees and relax. Today I decided to do a cat-eye make-up tutorial [to be posted later later sometime] and so I ended up taking a lot of pictures of my face! The best part about taking fun pictures is editing the everloving hell out of them to bring out the weird. Bzzzzzzzzzz!!! Here are my favorites ...

Ahhh! So fun! Okay, off to do more productive things, I swear ... ♥

Beauty Tip! [sort of]

Uses ... besides cow's udders!

great for just shaved legs [happening right now, actually]

use for eyebrow shaping, put a little balm on your [tooth]brush and brush eyebrows into shape!

  chapped lips? not anymore ....

works better than molding balm for my hair. just a little on the tips after flat ironing!

my only complaint? I can't find it in the round, war-time package! shucks ...

[more] Crazy Love & Make Up

Love Cher ... no, love Cher ... I mean, LOVE CHER!!!!!! 

I feel like I look like this, in my brain. I know that I don't. I mean, we have similar features, like crazy high/prominent cheekbones and hair that is usually limp. But I am clearly plus-sized and poor and she is not. It is helpful to have these delusions, though. I'll close my eyes and think "yeah, just flaunt it, girl ... 'cause you look like Cher." Does anyone else do that? Does anyone else have that person [celebrity or non] that they identify with, as far as beauty goes?

And Tiiiiiiilda!!!!!  I don't think any human can identify with her. She is from Jupiter or someplace, but I still love her; all her crazy outfits and hair/make up choices. 

Speaking of make up ... I'm on a dark lipstick kick lately. 

 ALWAYS wear lip liner ... best make up advice I ever got! No matter what color you're wearing, defining the shape of your lip is the best way to look like you're wearing it on purpose.

Avon "Cherries Jubilee"

Sephora "Bewitch Me"

 So there are some pluses and minuses to this heavy style of make up. Plus? You'll stand out! Even when I wear just simple red lipstick, I always get comments. [good and odd] I think that the darker colors are great for fall, but you have to be careful not to go too far. Con? You have to be very careful with everything else you wear that day/night. Usually when wearing a currant, raisin or plum color, you want to go neutral on the eyes. I can't NOT wear eye make up, because I have tiny possum eyes, but "going light" or neutral on the eyes is easy. Concealer, liner, light mascara. Also, no blush if you're going to go dark. Nearly every make up trick can be ruined by too much blush. [or tanner, but if you're wearing fake tanner, you're probably not reading this blog.] As far as everything else, don't over accessorize , pull your hair back, if possible and for God's sake, bring the lipstick with you ... you will be re-applying. Even the best lipsticks become uneven in such dark colors. Okay, that's all. You're probably not caring at all, but this is fun, so DON'T RUIN THIS FOR ME!!!!!!!!!

Keira Toothley

Before I get started ... let me say that "Keira Toothley" is a compliment. I have tiny teeth, I hate it. My Mom is toothy. I've always wanted that ... I really like it when a girl looks like she has too many teeth, like maybe she can't close her mouth all the way or even attempt to whistle. It thins out the face and makes for great pictures and I get the feeling that she never chokes on food because those chompers can get just about anything down. Now, let's talk about this ...

This outfit is getting criticized and I have no idea why. I mean, this works ... there are so many reasons why. We have here what appears to be demure and nearly prudish in cut, but the sheer fabrics, perfect fit and lack of ridiculous accessories make this a dream outfit for a winter's night out. The top almost looks like a burnout, boat-neck tee from Delia's that she's had for years, which I'm sure it isn't, but it's all about the finished look, right? I could wear that skirt every day of my life. Well, every night of my life, I guess. The fabric is sheer and a bit sparkly with a heavy trim of black at the bottom. Can you see her legs peeking through!? So great. The top of that skirt is pleated which makes me think the fabric is some sort of glittery organza I can only dream about wearing one day since the pleats don't fall as they should, but puff out when the seam stops. I happen to know she is comfortable because I have a skirt just like that [made out of boring tan linen] so the smile she has is more than likely genuine. My favorite part of that skirt is imagining her sitting down in the back of a limo on the way to this event, all puffed up and fabulous. Man, I'm so jelly! Perfect almond toed shoes; I'm hoping they're suede, I'm positive they have a platform. And Keira is practicing one of my favorite past times ... pulling your long sleeves over your fingers a la an angst-y Jennifer Love Hewitt in Party of Five.

The LV 2010-esque length [and cut] of the skirt, the platform pumps, the hair, the toothy, non-made-up face ... all of it. Also ...

If I ever get thin [and stupid-pretty], I'm doing this to my hair. Mark my words!

Neon Cheetah ♥

Yeah, girl! Do you ever feel like you want to just dance around with your Lisa Frank Trapper Keeper from 3rd grade, but not in public for fear of being labeled a Katy Perry fan? [yikes!] We might just be kindred spirits, then. I took a break from watching re-runs of Shark Week [hell yes] to take pictures of my obnoxious new nails. And by obnoxious I mean amazing!

Thanks, Heather! a.k.a. Whyte Spyder

My Friday Plan ...

Cheese, wine, grapes, sweater lounging ... you know, the usual.

Removes Dead Skin

I don't have to tell any of you about my obsession with Zombie stuff ... I mean, Zombee Candle? But seriously ... look at this amazing stuff I got from The Bubbling Cauldron on Etsy ...

Amazing!  It smells like heaven dipped in rainbows and it really does work as a good scrub for unwanted zombie skin. Nothing really ever helps my blackfoot condition [I've decided my Native American name is either "Walks With No Shoes" or "Eats Till Shamed"] but it does a pretty damn good job, seeing as how it isn't really meant for feet. 

I also got some "Witch Cream" which is code for magical lotion. So luxurious! So Autumnal. I cannot wait for the big, orange Harvest Moon!!♥

                               

If you haven't already made plans to be here for Halloween ... you might want to go ahead and take care of that. I am officially booked in a fantastic and possibly haunted [definitely historic] venue and arranging my menu for the night! There will also be a live band and a book signing by local authors of Historic Haunts of Shreveport. It will be a night to remember! Email me if you'd like to get an invitation in the mail! zombeecandle@gmail.com

Off to make some Spiced Tea and read more of Fat Vampire. If you are a reader, you should look into some of the Young Adult fiction they have out today. So hilarious! And I'm not just saying that because I am employed by our local library. Well, maybe I am ... 

UPDATE: I've changed my mind ... I'm going to watch Mermaids instead. Cher, Christina Ricci and Winona Ryder ... plus a Motown soundtrack? Yes, please. Great fall movie. ♥ G'night!