Molm ♥

So ... my Mom, [or "Molm" as we all say] is on eBay. I was Googling to see if I could find one of her records. My mother was a recording artist for Warner Bros. in the late 70s and she doesn't even have a copy of her own music! I'm pretty sure that even if I recorded my own song on a TalkBoy in my bathroom that I would have stock piles of copies just to brag when I'm her age. But, she always thought it was no big deal. So, when I went searching, I found her record on eBay as well as this ...

Isn't she the cutest!? I showed this to her and she laughed. Of course, I immediately thought about the stack of these postcards that my Dad has in storage. I mean, I can copy that signature, I've seen it my whole life! Let's make some money, y'all! But seriously, I'm really lucky to be able to have parents that gave a great example of fulfilling your dreams with hard work and passion. My Mom dreamed of being a singer, so she moved to Nashville and wrote and recorded music for years. Lucky for me, another one of her dreams was to be a mother to a big family! No family is perfect, and we've been through good and bad in our relationship, but my parents are truly amazing and it's because of them that I'm able to see the importance of doing what you love, making goals for yourself and striving to meet them. ♥

La Voz

Freddie would have been 65 today!! My hero, truly. Brandon and I met under the pretense of defending our fandom of Queen. I was wearing a t-shirt featuring Freddie and the boys and Brandon demanded to know whether I really liked them ... or if I bought the shirt from Hot Topic. He's lucky he didn't get smacked!! Our first conversation was about Queen, my obsession with Freddie and the fact that he shared that devotion. It was the closest to love at first sight that I've ever witnessed. We have plans to name one or more of our offspring after Freddie [born Farrokh Bulsara ... I think we'll stick to "Freddie"] and we hope to be able to share with them our love of Queen and other truly great music.

My earliest childhood memories were of dancing to what I would later realize is some of the the best music ever made in our den, laden with burgundy shag carpet and wood paneling. Queen makes me feel like I'm young again, even  though Freddie was dead before I was ten years old. 

Later, as I was realizing that I could sing, which I wasn't really aware was a anything special since I came from a musical family,  I began to appreciate his range and imitate his belting capabilities. He and Mariah Carey made me realize what is possible, range-wise and how that effects the type of music you can sing and the emotion you can add and transfer to others. It really is a shame that he died and Mariah stopped [really] singing. Where have all my heroes gone?

My friends will tell you ... whether they like it or not, if Freddie comes on the radio, someone is about to get a show. I love to sing Freddie. Mostly because the songs aren't something just anyone can sing, so there is a sense of pride that goes along with being able to please a crowd when singing Queen. And not just singing "We are the Champions" or "Somebody to Love" [which hardly anyone gets right]. Even singing karaoke in jest, the songs are great, but to really do it justice is something I strive to do anytime I drunkenly demand someone play "In the Lap of the Gods." One of these days I'll go crazy and YouTube a catalog of my versions of Queen songs. I'll probably have to do it with a bag over my head, but I think it would be fun! 

I truly believe Freddie to be the reason I paint my nails black, wear cat-eye make up and make it a point to sing at least one entire song each day. You know, just to keep the vocal chords loose and ready in case someone wants to hire me. Freddie is the reason I love skinny men with glorious chest hair, the reason I respect talent, the reason I don't need an alter ego ... the reason good fashion matters as much as good manners and the reason that being loyal to those I love is a lifelong aspiration.

So, in the spirit of "la voz"... on this amazing September day, enjoy some visual and aural inspiration only Freddie could give. 

    

Baby Brother

Baby brother on drums ... Louisiana Jazz Trio, Lafayette. Enjoy! 

Matlock!

Why hasn't anyone ever sampled this for a rap song? This jams ... hard. I kind of want to have it play on loop while I get ready every morning ... like when Cinderella's birds and mice help her get ready for her horrible daily life. I'm not oppressed like Cindy, so I guess Matlock will do, I only need something that makes me feel like a champ ... this is it.  Not only is it indubitably catchy [+10 for indubitably, right?] but it is a genuinely Southern trademark. Andy Griffith practicing law in Georgia in a big powder-blue suit? It's like seersucker, sweet tea, fried chicken and white guilt rolled into one! Who never watched Matlock at their grandparents house ... LIAR!! Stop denying it, you love it.

There are few things that can motivate a person like me [crazy] to do their taxes, work out, make and ship little Zombees and properly document said errands on the internet all in one day ... the Matlock theme is one of them. So, listen up, jam out, and get some shit done this weekend!

I love that it really starts to get funky when the black guy shoes up. Awesome. I had such a crush on him when I was a kid. That guy and Panthro ... I think I see a pattern! I think I'm going to start doing an "Inspirational Video of the Week" thing. It will be great, because it won't be awful stuff like "MattyBRaps" [how awful is that kid!?] but hilarious and relate-able stuff like ... jamming to Matlock for your common don't-wanna-get-out-of-bed blues that I seem to get every 72 hours. Yes?

Some Bossier Butterface

Someone needs to tell the woman [or man] singing this song to SIT DOWN and KNOCK IT OFF!! Is she really singing the letters LOL and making hand gestures a la "2 Legit 2 Quit"?! I love that she is breaking this song out like "LOL" is something new and exciting that she just KNOWS is going to catch on ... its 2011, no one even types "lol" anymore! I'm not L'ing oh L ... I'm crying and barfing ... what is the lingo/hand sign for that? I'm C/B'ing all over myself. 

So ... this is from Bossier, right? I mean ... I'm pretty sure I've seen this bitch driving her Tahoe to the Rock 'n Rodeo [where this was clearly filmed] to meet up with all her equally depressing divorced 30-something friends for ladies night so younger guys who tan and wear Affliction to make it seem like they're "buff" instead of fat can bang them in the bathroom and hopefully meet up later at Buffalo Wild Wings to watch wrestling.

I fully believe that this is what those women think they look like when they're standing outside Superior Grill on Saturday night at 7, waiting 2 hours for a table, wearing white eyeliner and sucking down those margaritas in hopes of snagging a "hottie" and making all the "haters" jealous. 

This is real life. This shit exists ... and it's everywhere.

Zombie Gaga

I'm officially, publicly calling "dibs" on Lady Gaga's Zombie Boy costume for Halloween this year. Pink hair, tux, face paint ... done. You'll just have to think of something else ...

Whoop! Gotta start collecting cotton candy colored wigs so I can make that sweet ass ponytail. So exciting!

Update: Here is the video, duh. Even though this sounds just like Express Yourself by Madonna, I still like it. And the video made it 10x better. Her body is capital WTF awesome. I showed it to Brandon and he said "I like that she jiggles when she kicks and moves. She looks real." ... gotta love that! Haha. I don't mind that she used the Vertigo score for the opening or that she gave birth to a machine gun. I like all of it. SciFi shit is always good with me. Enjoy! [warning ... if you're not used to Gaga, just know that this is totally weird.]

Also, this ...

Flossie 'n Them

I catch a lot of hell for being so critical about new music. I think the argument that I'm not allowed to complain because I enjoy all kinds of music is ludicrous. [I don't listen to Ludacris ...] Usually the people that consider themselves music savvy have never picked up an instrument in their lives. Not to say that because I'm a musician, I automagically know about music, but I'd like to think I have a leg-up on those who scream at me with white-knuckled fists because I laugh at their proclamations about Fergie really being able to sing or Kings of Leon being "uber" original and life-changing ... both of these things are false and I'm here to tell you that just because it is catchy or tolerable or different, doesn't mean it's good.

As far as "pop" music goes ... absolutely, but in the realm of really good music, Fergie will be forgotten, believe me. And people will soon catch on to those Kings and they'll fade as well. Pop music doesn't really bother me. I love dance music, rap, bubblegum pop, etc. But I'm sure I won't be listening to that stuff forever ... truly good music can transcend a generation and hold tight to their impact on those who experience it. The most hyped band from last year was Florence + the Machine. I have to say, the idea of a female Trent Reznor [in regards to how she forms her music and records, that is] was pretty exciting. I read that she is a freaking trainwreck in real life and when I saw videos of her performing on stage, I have to admit that I first thought, well she better be good, because she acts like an ass-clown ... but, I wanted to give her a fair shot.


Let me first say that I enjoyed the album, I really did. I don't think I'll listen to it again all at once, though. There are times that Miss Flo simply caterwahls her way through a song, but I think that people will see that as part of her charm, rather than an inability to hit notes. Whichever is fine; there are tons of genius musicians that have difficulty with pitch, therefore creating an interesting and unique trademark to their voice that can't be duplicated. [Bowie, Morrissey, Cher, Trent Reznor, Jack White] Which is great, because there is a little bit of duplicating going on elsewhere. I can't listen to Kiss With a Fist ever again ... it just seems like such a White Stripes rip-off. So blatant! I am always fascinated when people get away with that [... do people really  not see that Muse's Uprising is an insanely blatant rip-off of every  Queens of the Stone Age song ever ... mixed with Blondie's Call Me! And the Eurasia song is so, so wrong. Brian May complimented them on that one, but I really think that he thought they won a "Write Your Own Queen Song" contest.  Honestly ... I'm baffled. That album made my teeth hurt, I literally laughed out loud at Undisclosed Desires. Nothing wrong with paying tribute, of course, but there is a difference in showing your influences and glorified karaoke.] I really liked the Rabbit song and Cosmic Love really digs deep for emotional connection, which I definitely fell for.

My main, albeit involuntary goal, when I'm experiencing a new song, album, act, etc. is to find sincerity and talent while keeping in mind the context or genre in which it is produced. Whether that is in the technical aspect, in which Florence is damn impressive, or the quality of a voice when comparing it to live shows, [less impressive in her case] or the originality and style according to the effort as a whole. I encourage those young and old, musician or music lover who buy albums and keep themselves knee deep in the newest music not just to say "wow, catchy!" or "oh, man NME/Billboard/Rolling Stone/MTV/Hipster Doofus Weekly [that exists, right?] told me to like this! I must like this! If you really love music, dig a little deeper ... find out what you like and why and I'm sure you'll find that there will be a lot you could be missing out on. We live in a bandwagon culture ... which is why idiots like Katy Perry and Kesha [I refuse] are able to continue making money in the music business.

As usual, I won't apologize for being passionate. I love music and I think it is important to pass on that passion whenever possible. Music is a cyclical culture, based on ideas and efforts from the past, moving forward toward something new and exciting. This does not involve copycatting entire musical identities, but paying homage do those who have come before us rather than demanding greatness for mimicry. Plus five points if you read all of this ... and for the record; if you like Muse, I suggest you listen to Queens of the Stone Age's Songs for the Deaf  and Queen's Sheer Heart Attack for a start.

Meeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeemories!

These are a few inspirational videos that I love. I watch these when I need a boost for different reasons. Most of these are singing performances, because I sing, so I'm inspired when people sing well. Some are weirdly inspirational, but I'll try and explain ...

Christina Aguilera Grammy Performance, 2007

I saw Christina's performance yesterday and got sad; here is a woman who can sing like no one else, but sometimes seems like she doesn't care enough to try. Just because you're truly talented at something, doesn't mean that you'll always perform well. In actuality, some people who are extremely talented, use that talent as a fall back instead of treating every performance like a big deal. I find it truly inspirational to see someone really pull it out for a performance just to say "oh, yeah ... I mess around quite a bit, but watch this ..." Case in point ... video number one ... Christina singing It's a Man's Man's Man's World [actual title] as a James Brown tribute. She absolutely kills it. I know that is said a lot [most people are full of shit and/or denial ... remember my "epic" blog post?] but in this case, it is necessary to use that phrase, because I can't think of another that is worthy. I mean, think about the history of this song ... people considered it chauvinistic trash when it was recorded ... to hear a woman [much less, a tiny Latina] singing the ever-loving shit out of it to honor a legend like James Brown is just wonderful. Takes my breath away ...

Before you listen you should know ... when she is down on the ground and she goes way high and it sounds like she is off-key ... she is actually screaming, not singing. James B. had a habit of breaking out in high pitched screams and squeals in the middle of a perfectly good note just to show how he didn't give a f*ck and everyone better recognize. [Isn't that awesome?!] So, she is paying tribute all the way down tot he crazy, if you will. Enjoy!

Beyonce's National Anthem Performance

No words ... well, some words: everyone messes up the national anthem. From missing words, to too much yodeling to completely switching keys while singing it a capella. I am a firm believer that NO ONE WILL EVER SING IT BETTER THAN WHITNEY AT THE SUPERBOWL!! But, Beyonce comes in a close second. I would probably put Jennifer Hudson's at third just for the simple fact of "damn", but she really didn't stay with the true melody of the song. YouTube won't let you post the Whitney video, but I'm sure if you just type in w.h.i.t. into the search box at YouTube, her super bowl national anthem performance will pop up ... it's that legendary.

This performance is good for several reasons. Bey is dressed immaculately, her hair is in a cute pony and her make-up isn't bad, so the video isn't too "dated" [Whitney, however is wearing a red, white and blue windsuit with a turban style sweatband in her hair ... not exactly timeless]. The orchestra playing with her sounds phenomenal, whoever is doing the sound is making sure that everything is lined up and so the performance seems solid, technically. What is most interesting is the fact that Bey, who can yodel, howl, trill, dramatize and choke people with melismas with the best of them, refrains from getting too out of hand while still staying true to and showcasing her unique style of vocals. The last note is just amazing. She lands on the same chord as Whitney which is obviously a tribute, but goes above and beyond for a spectacular, horn-screeching finish. I don't believe she misses one note ... and I always catch missed notes!

Michael Jackson's Motown 25 Performance of "Billie Jean"

This is the first time Michael did his moonwalk ... the year I was born! I'm thinking that Billie Jean was a single at that point, which is why he performed it. He had been a star all his life, but this is really the moment he became a legend. He would go on to be the greatest pop music performer of all time! But, at this moment, when he still looked like a moderately happy person, surrounded by people who loved him, breaking out on his own from the Jackson 5, maybe not able to realize that he was about to take over the world and basically lose his life over it, is when I find him most inspirational.




Keri Strugg's Atlanta Vault

This is probably 100 videos in one for me. I was really addicted to the games that year. I guess I was 12 about to be 13 ... completely obsessed with gymnastics, as I have always been and still am. I loved bouncing around the house, memorizing everyone's routines and wondering why I couldn't live in a place that shipped me off at age 3 to learn how to win gold for my country. [honestly, I wanted to be a soviet gymnast so badly for several years of my young life, what the hell, right?] My favorites were always from the other countries, Lilia Podkopayeva, Mo Huilan, Svetlana Boginskaya [I probably just spelled all of those correctly after 15 years!] seemed to have much better stories and I felt that they needed and wanted it more than the spoiled Americans like that wimpy, cry baby Shannon Miller [I'm definitely reverting back to my 13 year old self ...], but as long as Bela was around, I was going to root for USA. I think this was the last, good American team to be honest. I couldn't even watch the last Olympics, all the American girls made me sick. In any case, I love to watch the '96 Olympics because it takes me back to that place where I was completely pre-occupied with dreams that would never come true. And I honestly think that these Olympics were the reason I became a swimmer and also the reason I was so damn good at it. I would have flashbacks of Podkopayeva's perfect FX, or Mo Huilan's unbelievable beam routine and get instantly motivated. Ah, the life of a jock ...

You'll notice there are no Halloween videos here. Most of my Halloween inspiration comes from movies and childhood memories, not YouTube videos, however ... I do watch Disney playlists and Halloween playlists on YouTube quite often and I always have Hocus Pocus there to keep me going if I need it!

Ri Ri !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

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My girl Ri Ri is looking gorgeous!!!!!! I want Bozo hair now!!!!!